By: Aqua Blutopia
Finding a Healthy Balance
At times, it may seem like it takes a village to raise a child,
but for single parents, that village often feels like a party of one. Single
parenting poses challenges for even the most organized mom or dad, and without
an extra hand, it can seem like a daunting task. 
A moment alone may seem like only a dream when you have the role
of both mom and dad. It is crucial for single parents to focus on the positives
in their lives and the joy that a child brings.
It is essential to accept that life changes with a baby and come
to the conclusion that this is a positive thing. To that end, with resources and support
systems in place, single parents can find the perfect balance while raising a
healthy child.
Facing the Challenges Ahead
Whether you’re nurturing an infant or a teenager, going it alone
can cause single parents to experience not only a loss of freedom, but also a
lot of stress. A flood of feelings can be overwhelming if you’re not prepared.
As a single parent you may feel increased stress due to having to
find child care, work and care for your baby as well as feeling guilt for not
spending the time that the mother or father would like to with the baby. All of these factors could interfere with
creating a bond with the baby or cause the mother to feel more guilt and put
her at higher risk for postpartum blues or depression.
Sleep deprivation can enhance the intensity of a single parent’s
risk of depression or postpartum blues. The challenges are often “compounded in
a single-parent situation because he or she often does not have the emotional
or logistic support to smoothly get through midnight feedings and soothing
sessions. As your child grows, the emotional toll of battling the terrible twos
or teenage angst can also lead a single parent toward feelings of helplessness
without the support he or she needs.
With only one source of income, financial strain often causes
anxiety for single parents, too. While raising children and faced similar
challenges. Beyond providing a stable home for their children, many single
parents are faced with the cost of child care, teenage activity fees and school
supplies. Not only does a single mother or father deal with the obvious challenges of motherhood that include learning to care for an infant, irregular sleep patterns and postnatal hormone adjustments, but the struggle is much deeper. The Single parent does not have the luxury of a spouse in whom he or she can share their concerns -- one who can offer those necessary words of encouragement and a listening ear.”
As children grow and get involved in sports, dance or music
lessons, and all requiring transportation from one activity to the next; the
balancing act can be demanding as a single parent. It is necessary for every
parent to learn balance to effectively manage this new stage of life, but with
a single parent, it is critical.
Fun-Filled Activities on a Single-Parent Budget
Just because you are supporting your family on a single income, it
doesn’t mean the fun has to stop. With a little creative budgeting and
planning, you can foster memories that are both fun and free.
Taking advantage of local parks and campgrounds. Teach your
toddler how to ride a bike, fly a kite or prepare a picnic lunch for a day at
the park. Enjoy an evening under the stars by pitching a tent in your backyard,
complete with a campfire and s'mores.
If your teen is interested in the local arts,
volunteer the entire family to usher a local play or volunteer as stage hands
to get behind the scenes. Giving back to the community through volunteer work
can foster a sense of charitable responsibility within your children. It gives
the whole family a way you can share the experience and you are not spending
money, while you are feeling great about helping others.
Finding the Support You Need
Single parenting requires creative planning and crafty juggling to
maintain a healthy household balance for both you and your child. In order for
any parent to be as effective as possible with their child, they need to have
some time for themselves and relaxation.
Family can be a big help for some, but it is also important to find
support from other sources.
Try nurturing your mind and body with a healthy routine of
exercise with your children. A daily walk in the stroller may help to soothe
both of you and prepare you both for a much-needed nap. A 10-minute soak in a
hot tub can do wonders for a single parent's peace of mind. Maintaining a
healthy diet and regular exercise will provide the energy level a single parent
needs to go it alone.
I recommend finding fellowship from church members, mom groups,
neighbors and single-parent support groups. Join groups where your child can
mingle with other children, and consider a child swap with friends and
neighbors to allow for some time out for yourself. Carpooling with other
parents will also cut back on your time in the car, transporting your children
to and from practices and rehearsals.
Asking for help is necessary when you feel stressed. Also tap into online support groups or a local mom to talk through challenges of raising either a baby or a teenager. It can work wonders for emotional support.
It is crucial for single parents to establish a support network
with others who understand the unique challenges of single parenting. Single
parents often feel increased vulnerability and think about 'what if something
happens to me and I can't take care of my child. A network of parents may
provide you with the reassurance you need as well as the time to meet your needs
and the patience to meet your child's needs. A support network can also get you
and your children out and about with others for affordable day trips, group
activities and meals in a supportive environment.
Above all, it is important for single parents of both babies and
teenagers to embrace the blessings that come with single parenting and accept
that you are one person, not a village, raising a child. It’s important to learn to forgive yourself
for all the things you want to do, but can’t.
Spend quality time with your child as much as you can and let go of the
idea of perfection. In the end, quality time is more important.
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